Bitter Romance
by Gamma Orionis
Summary: 100 30-word drabbles describing the marriage of Bellatrix and Rodolphus Lestrange. Written for MioneWazlib's 30 Words or Less Challenge on the HPFC. Extension of Hardly Romance. Unrequited Bellatrix/Rodolphus.
1. Chapter One: Rodolphus

Author's Notes: Written for MioneWazlib's 30 Words or Less Challenge on the HPFC. Extension of "Hardly Romance". Unrequited Bellatrix/Rodolphus, 10 30-word drabbles per chapter. Enjoy.

* * *

**Rodolphus Lestrange**

)O(

_Reality Check_

Once in a long while, she will show some semblance of affection. It gets me to thinking that maybe she does love me after all. Then I return to reality.

)O(

_Absolutely alone_

As long as I have her, I can have no one. I cannot bring myself to love another, and she cannot bring herself to love me. I am absolutely alone.

)O(

_Prince Charming_

I've tried to be everything a woman could want. I'm kind to her, and never become angry, no matter what crimes she commits against me. Why wouldn't she love me?

)O(

_Virgin_

I didn't want a virgin, I wanted an experienced woman. I didn't know that with experience would come independence and willpower. I wanted a virgin not in body, but mind.

)O(

_Good question_

She asked me once why I loved her, and I didn't know how to answer. I think part of it might be that I know I can never have her.

)O(

_Can you hear me?_

When I let myself cry, late at night, can you hear me? When my heart screams out for mercy, for freedom from from loving you, can you hear it then?

)O(

_I'm telling_

I'm telling you how I need you, but you won't listen. Don't you believe me, Bella? What will I have to do to convince you? You know I'd do anything.

)O(

_Out of control_

Sometimes I think I can't control myself anymore. I want to shake you, slap you, even kill you to show how I love you. But I know I'd never win.

)O(

_I love you_

I do. I will always love you, but you won't do the same for me. You love only him. And no matter how I love you, you'll never love me.

)O(

_Willingness_

I'd lay down my life for you. I'd fight to the death for you. I am willing to do anything for you. Why don't you let me prove that, Bella?


	2. Chapter Two: Bellatrix

**Bellatrix**

)O(

_Drunk_

I must have been drunk when I accepted your proposal. What's your excuse, Rodolphus? Why did you want to marry me so much, when it was clear I loved another?

)O(

_Disaster_

Our marriage is like a hurricane. You are the storm, wild and violent, doing everything to affect me, for I am the eye. And we leave destruction in our wake.

)O(

_Turned off_

You can do nothing to draw me to you. You do understand that, don't you, Rodolphus? For all your attempts, I can feel naught but contempt, perhaps pity, for you.

)O(

_Past, Present, Future_

In the past, I knew I'd never love you. In the present, I can only loathe you. You have no place in my future, and I am all of yours.

)O(

_Dysfunctional_

There's nothing you can do to make this marriage normal, nothing you can do to make it work out. Try what you want, but we'll always be a dysfunctional couple.

)O(

_Men_

They're worthless creatures. The person I love is beyond man, but you fall squarely into that category. Perhaps if you strove to go beyond base masculinity, I might love you.

)O(

_Behind my Back_

Why don't you go find yourself a mistress? You would do well to find some woman who would give herself to you as I give myself to the Dark Lord.

)O(

_Study Sessions_

When you go to sleep, I study you. I try as hard as I can to get inside your head, understand what makes you love me. It hasn't worked yet.

)O(

_Cut it out_

Stop loving me, Rodolphus, that's an order. I've tried to make it clear, but if this is the only way I can make you understand, so be it. Stop it.

)O(

_Dreamt_

I had a dream last night. I dreamt I was in love with my husband, instead of with the Dark Lord. I dreamt we were happy. It was a nightmare.


	3. Chapter Three: Rodolphus

**Rodolphus**

_Memories_

I remember the first time we danced. You were so graceful, so beautiful. I was awkward, ungainly in comparison to you, I know. But I knew I loved you then.

)O(

_Finish this_

If you really didn't care about me, Bella, you would break the marriage. I truly believe that you feel something akin to love for me, or you would finish this.

)O(

_Light_

I try to be your light, something good in your dark, bitter life. I try to bring you joy. And how do you repay me? With nothing but your contempt.

)O(

_Dark_

The Dark Lord makes no such effort on your behalf. He only draws you deeper into the blackness, until you are so blind you mistake the dark for the light.

)O(

_Rule Breaking_

He has decreed I cannot touch you. But there are times when I cannot resist. I need you close to me, and I will break his rules to have you.

)O(

_Holding Hands_

That's the closest I can get to you. I can still put my hand on yours, can't I? I am still allowed to hold my wife's hand, aren't I, Bella?

)O(

_Fearful_

Others fear you because of your curses, your torture. I have different reasons to fear you. The pain you cause me is so much more than what you cause others.

)O(

_Honour_

If you respected me, I would be happy. But I cannot blame you for scorning me – how could you see me as honourable when I can't see myself that way?

)O(

_Transportation_

I can transport myself to a world where you love me. I can sit and gaze at you for hours and convince myself you're mine. The illusion is easily shattered.

)O(

_Going in Circles_

That's all I'm doing, don't think I don't know it. I'm going in circles, thinking about you. You've made me lose my mind, Bellatrix. I've lost my mind for you.


End file.
